Lindt Bunny. He has been my constant companion on this journey of reckless under-employment.
His steely gaze has given me the confidence to stare joblessness in the face and laugh just like him- a sociopathic lindt bunny. He was my confidant and my inspiration.
His shiny golden armour of foil has always stopped me from giving into sweet temptation and taking a big ol’ chomp out of his chocolaty bunny butt. He has also given me my own metaphorical golden armour, for which I’ll always be grateful.
We were the best of friends…until now. Before I tell you what happened lets look back at some of the better times.
This is when the cheeky little bunny got into the herb garden. Actually it’s more of a Basil garden...
Ummm, okay my camera broke, but believe me, he was in the herb garden.
And this is when Bunny and I watched a clip on video piracy together. He’s against the burning of DVD’s and illegal downloads,
especially if it’s Watership down...
.... he's still watching... 
And here is a picture of maple syrup, because I couldn’t show you the one in the herb garden:
(a picture of maple syrup) 
Anyway, believe me, we had some good times! Things were going swell between bunny and I, until I started applying for jobs in the hospitality industry. Our lives stared to go in wildly different directions.
Bunny was living a life of leisure, while I would traipse around in the rain and mud applying for bar jobs to keep us both in the life to which we were accustomed.
Eventually I managed to snag a trial at the bad assest pub in all the land. Things were looking up on the job front. Maybe bunny and I could reconnect, maybe things could get back to the way they were. I did the trial and all seemed to be going well. They said I did well and they’d let me know how I went on Monday.
Monday went by, and then Tuesday and then Wednesday. I rang the pub and asked how I went and they said: “Sorry, the manager said ‘No”. I wondered if that meant, “The manager said NO bunnies, but yes to me working there”, he said “No, we don’t have a job for you” and then hung up.
I was in a rage. I decided to channel all my feelings of inadequacy and rejection into blame and I mostly blamed bunny. He could watch the Bold and the Beautiful whenever he wanted! Rooooaaar!! He could sleep in until 3pm and sleep with prostitutes and gamble basil leaves, while I had to starve and only eat Paddle- Pops!! Our friendship had to come to an end...
and this is what happened......
It didn’t end up making me feel better. It mostly made me feel a little sick because I’d lost a friend
..and also because I’d eaten quite a lot of chocolate.
I’m not proud of my story and I miss my evil little overconfident bunny friend.
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